What can a parent do when their teenager does not apply themselves at anything?

my 13 yo neice is failing at school just because she doesn't apply herself. She has had all the usual motivations as well as punishments and she seems to be numb to it all. She just doesn't care. How do you get her to change before it is too late?What can a parent do when their teenager does not apply themselves at anything?
perhaps there was a time of realization about their punishment... might be the parents forgot to reward her achievements, instead just focused on the mistakes...


there must be balance.... she was not given enough explanation as to why they do that to her, and where will the


process will carry her.


now, she is teen, there must be a diffrent approach then... but i doubt if it will work then....


she has to see the other side of life and the people to let


her choose if she would stay that way sooner of later she would be that person....she has to see the other side of the coin, ..and best is pray for the girl for enlightenment...What can a parent do when their teenager does not apply themselves at anything?
You need to find out whether she wants to be there - frighten her - giver her options.


Ask her what she wants to do with her life.


Don't be negative, don't tell her what she's doing wrong, try to talk to her. If she wants to do something important with her life, get a qualified job etc, tell her of the importance of school. Otherwise give her options.


School isn't for everyone - but for those who can't manage school - they need to realise they will have to get a job or apprenticeship.


Show her what it will be like in ther real world, make her pay rent and for food, and other living costs.


If she wants to remain at school and continue learning, ask her why she doesn't care, why she isn't applying herself. Different school? Different subjects? Needs a tutor?


See what she's interested in, what she wants.


In the end you need to stop talking, stop blackmailing, stop being negative and be more encouraging, rewarding and listen to her!


Adolescence is hard! The modern world has so much negativity and pressure, try make it lighter, let her tell you her side of the story.


Don't pretend to understand if you don't - that can be seen through - just listen and offer love and help


Her not trying at school could be from a range of different problems she has in her life try find out where the problem is coming from.





Good luck
Good question. Take her with you to your work place or other places. Let her know that life consists of work! People WITH education do 'this' particular job, or people WITHOUT education do 'this' particular job. Talk with her and get through to her that WORK is what we do when we grow up! Right now, your education is FREE, let her know that this free education is the first step to the expensive education that will come later, when she 'strives' to become something. Most of all, let her know that she should not rely on a man someday to 'take' care of her! Every female should have education to further themselves with greatness!
I'm no expert but I have a sister who's a teenager and she seems to have the same situation w/ your niece. You might need to communicate with her, she might be having difficulties at school (academics, teachers, social life and the like) that she's not telling anyone even you and with her seemingly 'I don't care attitude' might just be her coping strategy. Just my two cents' worth.
What these kids need is urgent intervention , which


in many cases there isen't.





The best you can really do is move her out for a year


permanently in the country....another state ( the whole


family ) another area....further away....





From experience ... people i know in this situation, the


certain types of groups have gotten to the child and they


refuse to head to the parents. If theres a chance for


councelling on a regular basis at least 2 times a week, you may have a chance yet !


Otherwise .......it will be too late, like many i have seen, no


matter what, nothing worked. There is a lot of heart broken


parents out there , that no one is helping and they still have


to get up in the morning and perform their jobs and face the


day ....mostly devastated inside.
This is a situation that shouldn't be taken lightly. Conference with the teachers and see if there is a possibility that depression or a learning disorder is taking hold. Take more interest in the teens concerns, likes, dislikes, etc. explain to her the importance of earning good grades and having goals for the future. Also, it could just be a phase that she may grow out of. I had a similar experience as a teen. Eventually, I grew out of it and have managed to stay in trouble in the 9 years since I was 13. Keep encouraging, supporting and letting her know you are still behind her.
For a time I was going through what you're neice is - an apathy towards education. What got me on track was a goal. I see it everyday at my school, the only reason these kids aren't motivated is that they don't understand whats out there for them. Find out what she's in to, look at career paths in that area, and set her down it. She might change her mind (as teenagers do), sure, but at least she is learning study skills etc; along the way.





Summary: give her direction!
maybe she hasnt found something that interests or inspires her yet. Expose her to various hobbies and she might find something she loves. Having something to look forward to will help other aspects in her life, such as school!
well you can make a reward system.


it always works :)


for every A she should get money or something.


or privelages she normally doesnt get.


etc
Unless you are raising her, this is her parents problem. MYOB
talk to her polite if keep do it it will affect her fucture