Wednesday, January 13, 2010

What is the best way to mix together 2 single parent families? We have 6 kids between us.?

I have a son age 10 and two daughters ages 8 and 5. He has a daughter age 6 and two sons ages 8 and 5. We want to move in together but a ';trial run'; this summer didnt go so well... please help!!!What is the best way to mix together 2 single parent families? We have 6 kids between us.?
plan a game day on a saturday. split them up between each other. not ur kids againts his but girls against boys or something and do several games. the trial rund didnt work b/c it was like being forced together. playing games increases sportsmanship and cooperation.





make it active games like a three legged race, egg walk, baseball and other mini gamesWhat is the best way to mix together 2 single parent families? We have 6 kids between us.?
Quit while ur ahead lady.
They are too close in age for it to work out. There would be too much rivalry involved at this point. Sorry.
If the ';Summer Trial Run'; didn't work out...what makes you think anything permanent will?





Nobody can ruin a romantic relationship than children from a previous marriage!





What you each need to do is convince your off-spring of your deep feelings for one another BEFORE co-habitating. Eventually one or more of the 6 will say to the others...let's 'cut them some slack!'





You can't expect your children to totally like or embrace the idea of a significant partner---who has the potential to become a parental substitute? You can only display the love and feelings you have!





Over a certain period of time...all 6 might like the idea that the two of you are HAPPY so they can possibly share the happiness with you?
Well the kids are going to be naturally jealous of each other because of the attention that they will crave from their respective parents. They will not want the other kids with their parent at all and so you will see your kids getting upset when his kids sit on your lap and visa versa. This is all normal and can be dealt with. You have to let your kids know that you love them and the other kids all the same and that right now you are with the kid on your lap and when you are ready your kid can sit on your lap for a while. It will happen with toys and the tv and anything that they will have to learn to share. Do sit the kids down and explain the house rules to them all at the same time. If it helps then print them up and place them in a visual place that you can refer to often. One of those rules should be no tattling unless someone is getting hurt. The kids need to learn to get along with only a mediator when they can not resolve the issues on their own. The discipline has to be the same across the board. 1st offense = time out: 2nd offense = no tv for the night. Or whatever works for you. Get them involved with the chores and have a reward program. Rewards need to be something that they can save for something that they want. It will take a while for things to really mesh but this can get you started on the right road. Psychologists say that it takes 7 years for the meshing to complete. Please have patience as there will be days that you want to pull your hair out. Always show a united front when dealing with a discipline issue. If the kids think that they can divide and conquer then they will certainly try. Never do the ';go ask your father'; thing. Just say that you will discuss it with their father and you will let them know what the 2 of you have decided. I hope this helps some.
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